Of course the word would be “calling” today, such a rich and meaningful word for a girl chasing after her own calling; and of course the writer’s block would persist.
I persist too.
I’ve been in a battle lately, but God is faithful. He is faithful to give me a role and a duty as a discussion leader at BSF so that I do not neglect time with him, which I have been tempted to do because I don’t want to hear from Him if it is not my will (petulant, I know), and He is faithful to speak to me through that study anyway. His call is a whisper, right now.
Set aside your insecurities, and remember Who I Am.
It is a slow process, this time, but I am familiar with slow processes.
Paul wrote, in one of the most confusing chapters in all of scripture (in my opinion), [from the Amplified Bible]
For the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable [for He does not withdraw what He has given, nor does He change His mind about those to whom He gives His grace or to whom He sends His call].
This is a promise I hold on to. I love that word, irrevocable. The image it conjures in my mind is a very formal document marked with an official seal of approval. All God’s gifts and promises and my call to share the Gospel in Spain written with swoopy letters and flowery language, and an enormaous blood (literally) red wax stamp.
Sorry, Satan. It’s irrevocable.