Today was a support deadline to attend Field Prep Seminar. It will pass without any fanfare because a couple weeks ago we confirmed an invitation to speak at a church the weekend we would have traveled. We are really looking forward to serving this church by helping at a youth event and sharing our heart for Spain on two occasions, and now we have set our sights on the November FPS and a January departure. We share a bit about that in our latest prayer letter.
Today I am writing to share how God has been encouraging me. Perhaps you too have been struggling with discouragement, even depression. Perhaps you too have questioned what God is doing, why He is allowing certain difficulties or remaining silent as you pray. I am disappointed, discouraged, and also confused. The call to Spain is as strong as ever, but in spite of our efforts, it seems we are called to wait right now, while God does other important work. This is not a new phenomenon for God’s followers, I know. But when I compared (WARNING!) myself to other missionaries, I can’t help but feel that something is wrong; that we’ve done something wrong. Perhaps we have. It’s inevitable because we’re sinful people. But God is still sovereign and He is at work. I can’t count all the ways the timing has been right up until this moment and I know that in hindsight I’ll feel the same way about this moment too. So how do I get my heart synced up with what my mind knows is true?
I have camped out in the Psalms the last few weeks, because God shows Himself praiseworthy there and I need to praise God when I am questioning Him. My mind knows the stories of His provision – in scripture and in my own life, He has been faithful. But when it is difficult to trust Him even when I remember how trustworthy He is, the Psalms have an answer. God. Is. Bigger. Than. My. Problem.
Psalm 42 is a favorite of mine at times like this. The first part of the Psalm reminds me of my daughter and singing As the Deer to her as a baby while I battled for joy during a bout with post-partum depression, which God brought me from triumphantly. The second part gives me a much needed perspective shift.
Finally, two songs I heard yesterday were like messages from God. I hope you’ll find them encouraging too. Matt Waller’s “While I Wait” and Sidewalk Prophets’ “Help Me Find It.” Both videos below include the lyrics.