Today my friend posted some photos and video of her little girl experiencing snow for the first time. As her husband gathered snow and helped his little girl experience the downright weirdness of it all (14-month olds are experts at balls for example, but snowballs disappear when you drop them!), my friend could be heard saying, “Daddy’s making you a snowman!”
And I was struck by the gift-ness of it all. Those are the moments that give me the most joy in parenthood; opportunities to give a little gift to Susanna, from small things like smooches and smiles, to big things (right now) like a longer bath or lingering over feeding and letting her get messy. It reminded me of something I said to myself when Susanna was born: I want to be a yes mom. I want to say yes waaaaaay more than I say no.
When I was growing up, I got a lot of yes, because my grandparents loved me and wanted to give me the world. But I also got a lot of no. Actually, it was worse: my dad made a lot of promises he didn’t keep, which means I heard yes, but got no.
So here’s my thought: if I am able to say yes a lot – yes, Daddy will build you a snowman even though we only got 3 inches; yes we’ll have cookies for breakfast; yes we can spend all day at the pool – then I know we’ll have the big stuff taken care of and these will seem like extra gifts around the Christmas tree to our children.